Summer is coming and my gut is huge!!!

It started on Thanksgiving and never stopped! In fact, Newtons law was in full effect and my body stayed at rest. Let me back up even further! I met an amazing lady about 2 years ago and started hanging out with her on June 16th and never stopped. When I met her I was 200lbs. Give or take a few bags of Chips and Salsa (Which BTW is the greatest food ever created! I just can't stop once I start.)

She asked me out to a cooking party that was at a friends house. She told me that it would be fun and she would like it if I could accompany her. What's a single guy to do when you get asked out by a hot single successful Christian business woman? You accept the invite and hope that it goes well. It went well! As a father of three incredible kids, I need to be careful of who I date, who I am seen with and I have to be on good behavior all the time. The Apostle Paul wrote: "Watch your life and doctrine closely. That way you can save yourself and the three amazing kids that God entrusted you with." SPRSV (Single Parent Revised Standard Version) We went out a second time and a third time and we have never stopped going out! There is a by-product to the great times and that is my size! I have gained 24 lbs. since I started going out with her. Here is a picture of me when we first started dating. I don't look too bad but still at this weight I am about 10lbs over weight according to the BMI that Kaiser has. I decided to not only start an exercise program today but I also decided to blog my exercise efforts and my set backs. As always these blogs will be done as first drafts and with no post publishing edits.

BTW The amazing lady that I am dating makes me so happy and loves me for who I am. I am truly blessed to be in her company. She likes me for the way that God made me. With all of my defects and insecurities. God! Thank you so much for bringing her into my life but forgive me for being so happy that I now look like this. I will keep posting as inspiration hits me.

I said "Will you Marry me?"

The Cliff House in Malibu was always a special treat. I had made the reservations in January. Tasha was in Russia with her mother. She would fly off for these cool vacations with her mom. She still does. Caribbean, Cruises, Alaska. Crap. She filled up 2 passports before I even met her. I think that it her moms way of bonding and staying in control and escaping from the reality that is her life. (that is for another blog) We had dated for a year and a half and the subject of marriage would rise often. I was ready. She wanted out of her house. I knew that she wanted out but I wanted to make sure that I loved her and that she loved me. I would pray that God would show me not just one sign but many. And he did!

Hello Joe? It is me Rodney. Can we meet for lunch while the girls are in Russia? Where would you like to go? Pizza Hut? OK.....How about someplace nice? OK..... Pizza Hut it is. We met at the one on Devonshire in North Hills.

Me: Joe, I love your daughter and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I want your blessing.

Joe: (said in a a subtle back east accent) Youz guyz dont have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out.......He scratches his head..... But then again her mom and I didn't have anything either.

Me: Is that a yes? If you do not answer me I am going to assume that I have your blessing. He didn't say no.


When Tasha and her mom came back from Russia, They were surprised to find Joe at the airport gate to pick them up. He never picks them up. In LA you take the Flyaway bus to Van Nuys. You call when you leave the airport and wait to be picked up.

Tasha: Is everything OK dad?

Joe: Your dingy boyfriend asked for your hand in marriage.

I do not know the rest of the conversation after that. All I remember hearing was my future father in law let the cat out of the bag. They show up at their house and the garage is open. Mind you these are anal people. They do not trust anyone. He must have been so excited to tell Tasha the news that he forgot to close the garage when he left to pick them up.

I had already purchased the ring and was waiting for the right time. Valentines was coming and the reservations were already made at the Cliff House. She said Yes!!!

15 years later I was served divorce papers.

She told me that she was unhappy. She said that she did not like the way I look and she did not even like the way I smell. She said that she must have loved me. We have 3 kids. I just cannot remember ever loving you.

At that time I was too numb to feel the hurt. I believe that God allowed me to guard myself from the pain.

Was it love? Was she just listening to outside influences? Why was this happening to me? I am the good guy. I am the honest one. I do not cheat. I do my best to provide and love my wife.

Then I realize that you can not force anyone to love you. Love is a choice. It does not just happen. You choose to love but first you have to love yourself. The only way to love yourself is to let God in. Your heart is good and has always been good. You just have to learn how to listen to it. Did I marry the wrong girl? No. I had a marriage. We had a great one. It was better than being in love. I think that it would have been nice to have all the romance and the passion that was not in my marriage but that is not what marriage is. Marriage is a commitment. I made a vow to love honor and cherish till death. I will stay committed to that. Do not get me wrong. I have moved on. She is the mother of my children and I will still love, honor and cherish. Just not in the same way as in the past.